Saturday, December 31, 2005

Who indeed!

Who would be blogging on new years eve?

Obviously, me.

I have always found that organized events suck. The only really great ones occur spontaneously.

The contrived new year's bullshit doesn't cut it with me, any more than that fake xmas 'good will to all mankind' crapola. It sits like a silage-fed cow's turd on your chest.

I'm having a few quiet drinks at home and watching Peter Jackson's 'Frighteners'

The unfortunate thing is that my CO2 cylinder has finally run out of gas after 3 years!

I can't get the cider out!

Maybe just as well, as I'm shooting moving target in the morning!

9mm or .357- decisions, decisions!

Wasting time on New Year's Eve

It's all generationxy's fault for linking those quiz's!

Der KommandantAchtung!

You are 30% brainwashworthy, 59% antitolerant, and 80% blindly patriotic

Opportunistic, patriotic to a fault, and not so fond of people who aren't just like you, you are like a Nazi General. Back in Germany in the 1940's, you would have been at the top of the asshole list. Not for Nazism, necessarily, but for your own sick, twisted values. Then, out of superior intelligence (relative to other Nazis, that is), you would've climbed to the top.Conclusion: you would have been a Nazi, and most likely would have served them well.

General suits me fine, you get to sleep in a bed, have a driver and get lots of perks! Why not, in real life, I held the same rank as Adolph!

Tits, ass & cuteness didn't work too well, a quite a few of the images wouldn't open, but I like slim women with smaller tits, based on what I could answer (actually, any women that would look out of place at a Labour/Greens convention is in!)

Another pint of cider...

The Debutante56%
Cute, neither Dark nor Light, and Stylish, you'll find the Debutante at high-class New York parties, making the rounds. She'll have a glass of champagne in one gloved hand, her hair perfectly coifed, her makeup exactingly applied. Her slinky, perfect little black dress keeps many an eye firmly on her, wondering what lies beneath.

Yep, I like them high class bitches! Like gals from Catholic schools, they are the naughtiest ones of them all , behind closed doors and still hold onto their class!- never will they say "Juss chuck it in, bro!"

Masculine/Feminine Test...

You are definitely more Masculine than Feminine in your tastes, habits, and style. You aren't very sentimental, and you don't like wasting much time on petty things. You know how to be straightforward without getting bogged down with trivialities. You also are generally comfortable with your surroundings.

Tell me something it didn't know, not sure where the other 9% went- the question about a sink full of dishes must have got me. I don't like looking at a sink full of dishes, because your woman should have put them into the dishwasher!...

More cider needed...

The friggin' death quiz has locked up, but I already knew I was going to die.

Time to go and clean my Luger, prior to having mit the shag with mine slim debutant wife!

Seig Heil!

Friday, December 30, 2005

A J Chesswas

Who I believe is a demented troll(s) taking the piss- but just in case you are 'for real'...

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Normality has been restored

That particular nonsense is over for another year. No more trifle for lunch and the cold meat has finally run out.

The boy's toys still all work (!) and I have my new toy now. The longer barrel spoils the look, but that's the NZ laws for you. The original is 11mm too short- bugger! Still, for a compact pistol, it shoots real straight!

I have discovered that the average section has few suitable places to hang a hammock or a shade sail, and I have a lot of large trees. I wonder how many of these things wind up gathering dust in the garage.

All the in-laws have buggered of up north, leaving me with all the remaining cider to finish. Now if only the wife and kids had followed...

Sunday, December 25, 2005


Well, the Roboraptor lasted almost five minutes before becoming extinct.

First repair job of the day- no, the roboraptor is OK- the 'new' batteries were fubar-feckin' warehouse! He actually shuffles along at a reasonable speed, now!

Setting him to attack Thomas, Percy and Toby was not a move guaranteed to keep the peace.

Now that the road set has been added to Thomas's domain, I have lost almost half the lounge. At least he doesn't need batteries.

4 1/2 hours until lunch with the outlaws, then it's cider time!

Friday, December 23, 2005

Holiday fun!

Chasing pussy in the holiday season:

On dealing with pesky Reindeer:

For the man who has everything

A jet-powered beer cooler!

No- really!

Already having a refrigerator, I'm going to get another pistol!

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Retail Hell

Today was my annual descent into the uttermost depths of Hell.

Christmas shopping.

A torment the wife finds necessary to inflict upon the rest of us. Unlike her, I didn't grow up with the fuckin' Waltons. My family has a tacit agreement to buy for our own spawn and not inflict the obligation to reciprocate. A very sensible arrangement!

As the maw of the pit opened, I fell into the first levels of my torment. The Warehouse. A seething mass of semi-evolved simians pawed shelves full of cheap and not so cheap goods. Few wore deodorant and all had children, most behaving badly.

After five minutes, Mr Three demanded the toilet. It was out of order.

The descent continued as I attempted to find a viewable DVD in the uder $10 bin, while the wife did a speed dash to the nearest service station, in search of a (working) toilet. My autistic 5 year old amused himself by snatching at passing handbags.

Departing with $90 worth of junk, to swap for other junk, it was time to buy food.

Express elevator to the Ninth Circle, going down!

WritePrice, Masterton- Vittuls fer Hillbilly's.

The demon lord of that plane had decreed his minions must push overladen trolleys full of beans, making progress on one of the busiest days of the year, near impossible. Especially when one of the lumbering she-mountains spilled into the same aisle.

Lured by the $3.98/kg pork special, the toothless unwashed had flocked from near and far and a forklift was kept busy resupplying pallets of Tui.

Mr Three again demands the toilet and again I'm left with a trolley full of pork and sausages- and the handbag-snatcher, who can reach the shelves in the narrow isles.

With the list near complete, I rush for the shortest checkout line. The trolley in front had been loaded by Mrs Creosote. Mr Five shits his pants- probably thought she was going to eat him!

The stench is great. And it's a thirty-five minute drive home.

I finished the shopping via the internet...

I don't like Christmas!

Glenn Baxter sums up Christmas, as only he can!

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Big Boy's Toys!

Forget Roboraptor- this much more fun!

1 1/8" lead ball


200 grains FG powder


Very big bang!

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Bloody Spoilers!

The house was a cube-like structure, built into the side of a hill. The whole site was on top of a ridge line, overlooking the ocean, the top two levels being above the ridge. Windows were occasional long slits, running horizontal in an otherwise plain wall.

I entered the building through a door on the lowest level at the rear of the house, the front being the side of the cube facing the sea. The entrance way was small for the size of the building, an area about 3 metres square, leading to a steep stairway, carpeted in grey wool. The walls were painted in a tan colour, with burgundy detailing.

The stairs went straight up about three stories and lead to a kitchen area. The kitchen was modern- industrial design, with glass fronted fridges and counter tops paneled in Tawa. The kitchen area took up one quarter of an open plan area, which made up a dining room. In this dining area, another stairwell lead below to a guest apartment. From the kitchen, looking to the front of the building, a wide bi-fold door(open) lead to a large lounge areas. This in turn opened though another such door into another lounge, the far side being the ceiling to floor glass of the front wall.

The whole area was in neutral white and beige and apart from the kitchen, a recent renovation, seem outdated and a bit shabby.

Heading down into the guest apartment, the colour scheme and decor changed dramatically, to an Art Deco theme. The colour being predominantly in pale greens. The stud was considerably lower here and the ceiling had the unusual decoration of a ornate molding in mirrored glass! The carpet was a sixties blue-green colour. The paint was flaking and spotted with mould. The bathroom had a green free-standing batch and the walls were tiled in pale green and trimmed with chromed steel.

The guest apartments lead to a utility space containing a walk-in safe and another smaller safe. From here we move to what looked like teenagers apartments. A kitchenette had a bar fridge still containing a few miniature bottles of spirits and a bourbon bottle with a few nips in it lay on its side on the bench. In a cupboard I found a half bottle of Absinthe!

The rooms here were painted in an off-white and were spacious and plentifully supplied with built-in shelving, now empty.

This apartment opened out into a patio. To the left was an outbuilding, which looked like an old laundry. It contained five old refrigerators, of 1950’s design, one containing a few loose cans of beer, the rest mould. A large, flat area was paved in concrete squares, the concrete being old, but uncracked and level, with aggregate exposed. Further over was a modern-looking outbuilding, about the size of a small cottage. It looked in good repair and condition.

The area had clear potential. It was tidy but was currently devoid of any form of furniture, decoration, colour or plantings.

The view towards the sea was, to say the least, spectacular, looking out towards the Tasman sea. We were 800 feet above the sea level, with a steep drop-off from the front of the house, to the rocky shore.

I will never forget this house. It was run down, parts were in terrible taste, but I had to have it! Beyond the wear & tear I could see a unique home- the sort that rarely comes your way. With money and a lot of work, it could be spectacular.

As I headed back to the house, to continue the tour, my wife woke me at 5.45am, with some totally unnecessary question about toast bread- the rest of the house was lost forever.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

The Death penalty- they don't do it again.

I have been following the debate on the death penalty, sparked by the termination of another oxygen-thief.

I didn't always support the death penalty, but within a week of working in a prison, I had re-examined this point of view!

Firstly, this is how I believe it should work.

1- The evidence must be incontrovertible- DNA match, video , multiple eye-witnesses- 'smoking gun' scenarios.

2- It should only be for premeditated murder, or murder in the commission of another crime

3- There should be a mandatory jail term, to allow for the appeal process or new evidence to surface- say five years. Time to pray that there is an all-forgiving God out there.

Back to the 'why's'

My experience is that those who fit this category have seldom lead a life of virtue. They generally have at least a couple of pages of convictions for lesser wrongdoings, before doing the big one. Of interest, I often would see 'theft of a bicycle' as the start to a career in crime.

The sort of murderer who has lead a useful life, then snapped one day and took the tomahawk to the mother in law doesn't fit the criteria for a hemp necktie. Nor the lad who at 18 and no dealings with the police, got into a brawl in the pub and hit someone a bit too hard. They are due serious punishment, but not death.

One comment that surfaces is that 'No person (or the state) has the right to take another's life'

That would be their opinion, as mine is to hand the bastards. I don't see it engraved on a mysterious prehistoric black obelisk. Even the line in the other mysterious object 'Thou shall not kill' is accepted to mean 'thou shall not murder'.

I suspect many of the 'no executions' camp have little experience in crime or criminals, outside of books.

The 'rough men that keep you safe, at night' have a different outlook. A much more pragmatic one. Dead crims don't cost money or reoffend. And justice is served to the victim.
Something not happening now, where the concern is for the 'rights' of the criminal. Something that should have been severely curtailed when the judge said "Guilty!"

I would love to see some of the 'crims are humans too' crowd spend a few day behind bars, in a high security unit. They may find their objectivity shifts, as the go from theorizer to prey.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

The pros and cons of Christmas

I sold of a trailerload of worthless thinnings from the firewood block for an outrageous amount of money.
Cooking a whole ham on the Weber.
Eating a whole ham cooked on the Weber.
60 litres of Cider awaiting consumption.

Plastic trees shed crap on the carpet, too.
Spending money on non-firearm related purchases.
Not receiving firearms related gifts. (Where's my friggin' Weatherby, Santa?)
3 year-old waking at 5.45am to check if it is xmas yet.
Prospects of sex, because of the above.
Wife's expectations. (why bother, I'm not getting sex!)
Christmas Carols.
Sunday IPSC shoot cancelled due to it being xmas day! (what??)
Sugared children.
60 litres of Cider awaiting consumption.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

The Death of an Era

A MAN whose business acumen sparked Wairarapa's most hotly contested grocery and liquor price wars died yesterday in Wellington Hospital.
John Chung, owner of Chungs Supermarket in Featherston, had been ill in hospital for several weeks.
Mr Chung virtually pioneered grocery price wars in Wairarapa in the mid-1960s by going head-to-head with several rival grocers, determined to offer goods at the lowest possible price.

Most reading this would have no idea who this person was. Mr Chung was one of the last true independent supermarket operators. He wouldn't have a bar of franchises and refused to follow the trend of continually tarting up the shop. He ran on a shoestring budget, doing his own signwriting and even building extensions to the store himself.

He was a hard nut- he wouldn't take cheques, took a hard line on thieves and the under-age could never buy a bottle from him!

The local trust-run (and very expensive) supermarket claims to be there for the community and it is true that they put profits back through donations to charities. But John Chung sold stuff at way cheaper prices- That is what really helps the community!

The rulers of this land could learn from his example- hard work, thrift, no waste and most of all- what helps us most is hanging onto our money, not paying a lot more to maybe receive some back...

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Reparations payments- what a friggin' joke!

18 months ago, I was awarded $10 grand reparations, following being crunched by a dumbfuck drunk driver.

So far I have recieved one payment of $700 and today, almost three months later, another for $50 bucks turns up.

Fifty friggin' dollars- that means he is paying it at five lousy bucks a week!- no doubt the worthless POS is on the dole again.

That will take THIRTY-EIGHT YEARS, TO PAY ME OFF! it will only happen that quick, as I get no sodding interest on the amount owed.

I don't see why these deadbeats can't be sold into indentured service of some kind- scrubcutter or dung-gatherer would be suitable. Get enough of them and they can work a big treadmill and generate electricity.

Bring back the workhouse!

Sunday, December 04, 2005

Fair Go, Target.

Why bother with panty-sniffing plumbers, when much bigger fish are stealing form all of us?

"What about ACC? Gungho Fraud investigator want ed the product, Womble perpetual ass-kissig manager says cost too much……how big was the problem at ACC?
They told us $100 million estimated by individuals, $100 million by medical providers and $50 million by staff!!!! Yep $250 million. - hat tip-

Surely this beats the hell out of dodgy washing-machine fixers or cleaners that use the same cloth?

Or are the program producers employers not on the target list- no matter how bent they may be?

More objective journalism in NZ...

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Life in the Septic Tank (Job Hunting)

I decided, of my own free will and without prompting, to remove last night's vodka-fueled dissertation on the personal habits of HR goons.

Although I still consider them shit-eaters on the bottom of the pond. The pond being the type found on dairy farms.

When being interviewed, I have found honesty to be the best policy, given that porkies easily trip you up. That is why I find it particularly annoying when the interviewing panel start with the BS. I have spent a lot of time interviewing, myself and are quite good at spotting a player of games. Often it's not one thing, but a series of small slips, that gives the game away.

The other one is that NZ is a small town. This is how I KNOW that a job is going in-house and that the interviews are just a matter of form as "HR says we have to follow the 'process'"

They know damn well who they are going to hire, the others that have spent the best part of a day filling out their wanky 'self-assessment' forms, then blow a day going to an interview, are just being jerked around. This covers three of the last four jobs I have applied for.

Fucking time wasters- being interviewed by clowns that obviously have not bothered to read my CV, just because HR dictated the must interview 4 (or whatever) candidates.

And I seriously dislike having my time wasted!

Yeah, I know this sounds like sour grapes on my part and there is a component of that. But I bet anyone who has been on the market for a few years has struck this!

Whilst on the subject, I must mention 'The Great Skill-Shortage' spin. I believe it is a beat-up by lazy NZ business to import ready-trained immigrants, rather than train up someone, who may have the aptitude, but not the specific training.

(I didn't vote for Winston, BTW!)

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Children, aircraft and bloody useless staff

On a flight of any duration, the last thing I would want is to be in the same part of cattle class with small children (including my own)

I would be a bit peeved if I was asked to move, because I may be a perve, mind! Any of the gloried tea-room staff called cabin crew should be able to pacify me easily. An upgrade or a very large and expensive drink would work wonders. My experiences with the offending airline is that the mutton-done-up-as-lamb cabin tarts couldn't keep hungry wolves in a butcher's shop. (this was some years ago, I must admit)

Working in the sex offenders wing of a prison has made me a bit touchy about being thought of as one of these filthy subhumans!

I don't regard the incident as being a great example of PC'ness, just bad management by the airline.

The real PC dicklickers are the ones slamming Mr Worsley for daring to speak out!

Sunday, November 27, 2005

ERO Morons (again)- your tax dollars at 'work',,11964-5075413,00.html


Teachers are being ticked off for dishing out lines to teach students a lesson. The Education Review Office has pulled up a west Auckland school for making students write lines for bad behavior. In its latest report the ERO has suggested Westbridge Residential School revisit its use of writing as a disincentive. After completing a standard review of the school it found students sent to time out were required to copy out a sheet of writing. The intention is to help them reflect on their experience. However the Education Review Office suggests this could lead students to regard writing as a form of punishment.

ERO- Anal-Retentive Masters (or should that be gender- neutral!) of PC-ness gone mad, strike another blow for the destruction of the NZ school system.

fortunately, most school kids are balanced enough to avoid being traumatized by writing lines and will go on to lead productive and useful lives. The others will find that the public service uses keyboards, nowadays- so no harm done either way!

Friday, November 25, 2005

It's been a long few days!

It has been, and I haven't written sod-all here!

I have done about 15,000 words on my latest book, in the last week, though. I will be back when the money-making stuff slows down. It's a bit like hay-making- when the ideas come, you write and damn everything else. When the story takes me, sex, food and physical comfort follow behind. It doesn't last that long ;-)

Monday, November 21, 2005

Weally Depwessed Wabbit Wooter

From the Strange, Rare and Peculiar files (Barking Mad section):,2106,3485166a11,00.html

SYDNEY: A former Auckland man, charged with animal cruelty and bestiality, failed to meet his bail conditions because he was too depressed to leave his house, a Sydney court has been told.
Brendan Francis McMahon, 37, appeared in Parramatta Local Court on Saturday after failing to report to police as required by the courts on Thursday.
McMahon is on bail on 21 charges, including aggravated cruelty to animals, bestiality and drug possession.
Police alleged when he was arrested in August that 17 dead or dying rabbits and a dead guinea pig were found near his central Sydney office between July and early August.

I would be bloody depressed too, if that was the the only way I could get any action!

Friday, November 18, 2005

Name the Picture!

I found this interesting picture, on my travels (Hat tip to Doderryoldfart )

I like to call it:

'Your Tax Dollars'

Can you think up another name for it?

Thursday, November 17, 2005

On Religion, Spirituality and masturbation

It seems I can't go a month without offending someone's deeply felt religious beliefs. It's not really good enough- I should be upsetting them on a weekly basis, at least!

I don't actually have a problem with other people's beliefs. They might be irrational and masochistic, but that is their concern. Like wanking, it is socially acceptable if done in private and without announcing it to the world.

I suppose people who spend hour in prayer, meditation or ritual aren't climbing though windows and removing your property. I used to live out the back of the Hari Krishner temple in Christchurch and I never saw anyone in an orange sheet trying car doors at 3am.

When I do start taking exception with matter religious, is when they go missionary. I want to hear the word of the lord as much as I want to listen to the guy in the next flat wanking like a mad monkey. Hell, I heard enough mattress abuse and onanism to last two lifetimes, when I worked in the prisons!

The REAL problem starts when religion and politics start to mesh together. Look at the basket-case nations of the world, to see the results. (with North Korea, Kim Dim-Sim and the State are the religion)

The Destiny church are a dangerous lot, too and one that is probably not taken seriously enough. It looks like Fascism wrapped up in family values to me and I would trust them about as far as I could comfortably spit a large rat. They quite remind me of the Fosterites in 'Stranger in a Strange land'!

A long time ago I came to the conclusion that debating with the religious is like teaching a pig to whistle, so I don't bother. It's in the same league as talking Libertarian policy, to a Labour party member.

So the most they get from me now is a 'Sod Off!'. You only get so many breaths in a lifetime.

They are as likely to give it away, as a teenage boy is to stop wanking.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

The Impending Doom

In the past, I have often made predictions that have come to pass, despite being told by 'experts' that I'm blowing smoke out my arse!

For instance, in reply to my speculations:

"Games will Never be developed for 486 machines- those are for serious business users!"

"Nobody would go to a small bar that served only wine and bottled beer and didn't have a band"

"The Internet will only be used by nerds and academics "

"Wine will never be popular in New Zealand"

"cellphones will only ever be used by businessmen"

OK, these are more a reflection on the myopia of others.

My prediction now:

We will have what amounts to another World War, by about the end of the decade. Riots, such as those in Paris, will be on-going throughout the Western world (and probably most of the rest) Most of the world will be like Northern Ireland was, so recently.

Yes, here, in New Zealand, too!

I also predict a backlash against the whole PC kid-gloves treatment of other cultures. As with backlashes, the pendulum will invariably swing too far, with mass deportations, gulags and all that goes with them. Totalitarian governments will become the norm- look to the US for this, as agencies lobby for legislation to give them more and more power.

We still need to take a lot more pain before this happens, but I feel it coming.

Why is this happening?

Those who despise our way of life have found a major breach in our defenses and are cleverly exploiting it. We cannot speak out against the very cancer that is spreading- that is called 'Hate speech' (gag!) and carries hefty penalties.

It's easier to police than a rioting mob, too...

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Some (serious) Politically Incorrect questions

Hat tip to Seawitch, for these questions

Some Very Good Questions
Islam is referred to as the Religion of Peace and yet the vast majority of the world's terrorist attacks are perpetrated by Muslims. Jihad Watch has questions asked by Dennis Prager in his LA Times column. Below is the first:

1) Why are you so quiet? Since the first Israelis were targeted for death by Muslim terrorists blowing themselves up in the name of your religion and Palestinian nationalism, I have been praying to see Muslim demonstrations against these atrocities. Last week's protests in Jordan against the bombings, while welcome, were a rarity.

(2) Why are none of the Palestinian terrorists Christian?

(3) Why is only one of the 47 Muslim-majority countries a free country?

(4) Why are so many atrocities committed and threatened by Muslims in the name of Islam?

(5) Why do countries governed by religious Muslims persecute other religions?

I don't think we should hold our breath waiting for a reply...

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Judges- a big part of the problem.,2106,3475966a10,00.html

Principal Youth Court Judge Andrew Becroft said yesterday it was the length of time child offenders were being kept in police cells that was scandalous.
"It is a very serious situation when vulnerable young people are locked up for that long.
"It could be argued that a night in a cell might not do a potentially serious young offender any harm, but when it becomes a week in virtual solitary confinement, it is quite scandalous in a civilised community."

These little slime-buckets are already FUBAR. I agree, most of them shouldn't be locked up, they should be humanely put down.

FFS- a week banged up in solitary is nothing. These POS don't live in the civilised community, in any case!

Maybe Judge Bleedingheart can put them up at his house?

Some police officers spoken to say there is growing frustration at the number of youth offenders who are remanded into police custody.
"These aren't your typical children of course; they are obviously hard-core and hard-out, but they should not be with us. They need to be in a secure facility designed for children," said one officer.

See my comments above. I think the police, like many of us are frustrated that we can't just shoot them!

Judge Becroft said extended confinement in police cells was "wholly unacceptable".

Cry me a river- having them at large in the community is 'wholly unacceptable'!

What do these overpaid snivel servants propose to do with this plague of feral children?- other than pontificate on those who actually have to deal with these little scrotes, that is. I'm sure they would be the first to call the same police that they so love to condemn, should they find one of these ferals makinfg free with their property.

Meanwhile, the rest of us- the ones these judges are meant to serve, believe the disgrace is not in locking these swine up- but is THE CRIMES THEY COMMIT and the fact that the namby-pamby laws let them walk free for anything less than murder.

We (the 92% that want the worthless locked up longer) want judges to apply the full penalties of law- to these ferals and those who are blatantly neglectful in raising them.

The worst of them are like mad dogs- one cure for a mad dog and it involves hot lead.

As for Judges, I'm starting to think they ought to be elected officials. A little fear for their gilt-edged jobs might make them more responsive to the community.

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Political Correctness in the home

Some things just don't go down well, at home. Here follows a list of things best avoided, left unsaid or done behind locked doors- this may keep YOU out of trouble!

Describing wife's friends as 'Severely Fuckable'
Describing wife's sisters as 'Severely Fuckable'
Describing any of the cast of 'Hi-5' as 'Severely Fuckable'
Teaching boys how to light farts.
Using the dishwasher to clean your pistols .
Making fireworks.
Tampons are not a firearms cleaning aid.
Reprogramming the remote control minus channel two.
Referring to the children as Demon Spawn or Satan's Little Helpers.
Using a bra as a flying helmet, whilst doing Biggles impersonations, no matter how funny the boys find this.
Rum does not go in the goldfish tank.
Ronald MacDonald does not really eat children.
Ronald MacDonald is not the antichrist (he hasn't passed the exam)
I don't eat babies and should not tell small children that.
Baby oil does not contain babies.
The Warehouse is not the place that 'Boys go in, Sausages come out'
Green plants are a food group.
Eggs are not aborted chicken fetuses.
Hot dogs do not contain their namesake.
Insolent children are not placed in a burlap bag and beaten with a reed.
Urine might be good for citrus trees, but not while anyone is watching.
They are breasts, not 'Dirty Pillows'
Cosmetics do not contain Whale blubber.
Sugar is not 'Kiddie P'
Three year-olds do not learn to say "Pull your finger out, women", all by themselves.
The children are not the Spawn of Satan nor the Midwich Cuckoos.
Rest homes are not 'Pre-Death Storage Facilities'.
Other people's children are not 'grounds for post-natal abortion'- at least in front of our kids.
menstruating women are not 'Unclean'
Pre-menstrual women should not have to carry a bell.
Girl children are not 'Duds'
Full Metal Jacket, Saving Private Ryan and Blade Runner are not suitable viewing for under 10's

I will not notice who is wearing g-strings at playcentre or at least not remark on this.
I will not point out to the boys- "look at the enormous elephant knickers!", in department stores.
I will especially not do this in Kirk's
Telling telemarketers to "sod off and die" is considered impolite..
Telling collectors I have their disorder and need some of the collection money now, is embarassing to others.

Friday, November 11, 2005

In Praise of Poteen!

It ranges from good clean alcohol, to stuff that has been used to marinate a long-dead fish. It is as good as it's maker. If they pay attention to detail, don't take shortcuts and use a quality stainless steel reflux still, they can make a very decent product indeed- one that does not require liberal quantities of mixers, to make it drinkable.

I usually produce something like the above, but this time, my product resembles window cleaner. I should have gone to the farm and got some good non-compliant creek water, instead of using town water, which tastes like the swimming pool water, from a school for the incontinent.

Still, that is what Coke is invented for- to make bad booze pleasant, or at least drinkable.

But the real joy of Poteen is not about taste. It's about savoring a drink, knowing that you are not financing the govamint's social agenda's. (aside from the GST, etc. On the Coke- bugger!)

Ok so knowing that I have won a small victory is no big deal- or is it?

We need to keep winning more of these small ones. Most of us will never go on to win the big battles- but it is within us all to keep winning small ones.

Grow your own tobacco, do a deal for cash or trade- teach someone else how to do so.

Don't let the bastards grind you down. It's going to be a painful three years, mark my words.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Get a grip, France!

You know how to sort the rioting rabble out!

Don't forget to grease the blade- a bit of lard should do nicely!

Monday, November 07, 2005

commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Big Deal, So What?

I see a lake of crocodile tears being shed on the blogs and newsgroups, at the demise of Ron Donald.

Hell, it's just one less politician, to me.

I don't know him personally. I certainly can't stand his party or their ideals- they are just a bunch of control freaks with bad hair.

People die everyday. Why get upset about some character you have never broken organic bread with- nor ever would?

Doesn't make sense to me- but that's people for you!

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Morons I have met- ERO

Toady an ERO report came back from my son's local school. It contained this little gem:

"Findings also highlight significant areas requiring improvement including the development of an English implementation plan, strengthening assessment and quality assurance processes and addressing poor quality teaching in some classes. Recent valid and reliable data show that many children are achieving at below average levels for their age against national norms."

Now if you have an average, surely that means that in a group, there will be those above and those below the average.

So does the school have to produce kids that are all average or above? That would be a neat trick. Having achieved that, they can move on to developing a peace plan for the middle east, banning ugliness and getting us to all love one another. Big group hug!

Back in the real world, the successful will succeed, the mediocre will go work at the Warehouse and those below average- well, all is not lost. Those way below average can always find employment in the government apparatus...

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Ask why, indeed!

I found this story today:,2106,3464384a11,00.html


Police wary of camera phone benefits 02 November 2005
The rapid increase in the public's use of camera cellphones is being viewed as a double-edged sword by police.
Rotorua Constable Darrell Earney was annoyed that members of the public stood by and took pictures with their phones as he struggled to arrest a young man for riding a bicycle without a helmet.
He said at least three or four people were taking photographs instead of helping when an officer was in trouble.

Now the story was about cameras, but note the last sentence. People wouldn't come to the assistance of a police officer.

Why would they? When defending themselves, family, homes and property, they are invariably before the courts for doing so!

What is the continual messages from senior police officers?- don't tackle offenders yourself!

Jump in to help a cop and you happen to do the offender some serious damage (easy to do)- see what happens. You can be fairly confident that a jury will find 'not guilty', but you will lose the family home defending yourself.

Until ALL citizens in good standing have the right to use all means available in defence of self or others, expect to see people stand back and watch bad things happen.

The police are in the same sad situation as the rest of us. The answers are at a political level and while we keep voting in wimps and wowsers - expect more of the same.

Saturday, October 29, 2005

A new PC term- 'Intellectually Lazy'

This is the latest piece of politically correct lefty wankstain gobbling that has got right up my nose!

Delivered with the smugness that only a labour voter on a six-figure income can deliver, this is the latest label for the likes of myself who spit on political correctness and those who believe that it is 'just good policy'

It probably originates out of these spineless snivellers believing it is too rude to say 'Redneck' or 'Bigot', in this enlightened age.

I'm well aware of the origins of the term PC (socialist Russia) and I also know that it is now applied to a far wider range of subjects than the original term covered. Like may terms, meanings change with time, the English language being a living, evolving one. The nearest thing to an international language there is. Everyone I know that uses it in conversion knows exactly what it is describing.

Friggin' fascist social engineering, through the creation of taboos!

I have been told that it is intellectually lazy to use the term PC, as by doing so, one dimisses an issue as not being worthy of debate. Now hang on- PC places issues beyond debate, by shouting down all that challenge them as immoral and/or criminal.

Aside from that, I don't have the time to debate issues I consider total donkybollocks, in the first place. Such as the need for a plethora of McMinistries in government.

I suppose I might, if I had acquired the habit during my six years of study to gain a B.A.

preferring action and working to navel-gazing, I was spared that!

I'm bloody glad to move in circles where these limp-wristed WOFTAMS don't exist!

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Classic design I

Accepted into service by the USA as model of 1911, designed by John Browning several years earlier. Now, the grunts in Iraq all want one of these on their belts- the new 9mm just doesn't cut it. As the US army found out fighting the Moro's at the turn of last century- .38's just didn't drop the bad guys quick enough.

JB has designed guns that are still in service- they can't be improved on significantly. One of the major manufactures did a study on pistol ergonomics, with the aid of modern technology to discover that the 1911 had got it right- the size and angle of the grip was the optimum, fitting the widest variation of the population!

Of course, the pouges in their air-conditioned offices don't have to bet THEIR worthless lives...

This is my one( the top one- I can't figure out how to move the damn thing!)- A Tanfoglio copy of the original. The same design, but better materials and craftsmenship.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Community's Problem, who's fault?

I have been hearing much waffle about how the community needs to be responsible for youth offending.


I refuse to accept one iota of responsibility for some crap-head's bad behavior. The offenders must take the heat for their offenses. Most of their parents could use a size 12 up the arse too!

OK, so most of us are not responsible for their anti-social carrying on. Many would LIKE to take some responsibility in dealing with it, regardless.

BUT, the same crowd stating 'we' must take ownership' are the same arseholes that have made it impossible to actively do something tangible about people's anti-social behavior!

All to often, someone when driven to their wit's end by crapheads has thumped one or put a loader into there shitbox racer wannabe car- and it's straight into the dock!

In my town, we have less than a handful of persistent vandals. Their parents won't discipline them, but there are many here ready to dispense some rough justice (the only sort they understand) Of course, they do not- they have too much too lose, when the powers-that be descend upon them, with all the power of the courts- in a way they seem unable to do with these young criminals or their totally useless drug-addled parents.

If the grey shoe wearing, trying to be gay, bleeding heart whale-hugging policy makers hand the power back (yeah, right!), they community WILL deal with the problem. In the way it used to do- with a clip round the ears or a policeman's boot up the arse, at a young enough age for it to matter.

And tar & feathers for those who won't learn!

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Dumbfuck of the Week

These words of wisdom from the Wairarapa Times-Age

Candles and petrol: A bad mix25.10.2005
A MASTERTON man accidentally destroyed his girlfriend's car when he was draining the petrol tank – while using a candle to see what he was doing.
The naked flame ignited the petrol vapours and fire quickly engulfed the car.
The incident happened on Friday night and by the time the fire service arrived the car was beyond saving.
Needless to say the girlfriend was quite upset by the unfortunate turn of events.
Station officer Garry Nielsen said the incident illustrates that many people are not aware of the dangers of flammable vapours.
"Naked flames around flammable liquids – just don't.

"Dealing with any flammable liquid is hazardous. Always take care to make sure they are stored in the proper containers," he said.

Is it any wonder that about 30% of the denizens of Rimutaka Prison give a home address of Masterton? I believe that Insolent Prick has rightfully commented on this, previously ...

Here be the shallow end of the gene pool!

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Dumbfuck of the Week

Web posting gets driver arrested

Oct 19, 2005
A Christchurch man has been banned from driving for a year and ordered to do 120 hours community service after posting a video of himself on the internet driving recklessly.
The 21-year-old pleaded guilty in court after the pictures showed him speeding, spinning his car and crashing on a public street.
Police received a number of complaints from people in New Zeland and overseas who saw the video on the internet and were able to indentify the street and the driver.
Inspector Derek Erasmus said the man was the author of his own demise.
Source: RNZ

Lets just hope that when he does manage to kill himself, it's a solo act...

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

The most fun you can have (in a vertical position)

Took this one out today. One of the things I like about these smoke-sticks is when you fire and "what the fuck was that!" starts coming from the other shooters on the line, as the place lights up with the muzzle flash, then fills with smoke!

Firing it is serious fun- all you see is a ball of orange fire and everything is briefly blotted out by smoke...

Downside- getting it back to looking like the picture above, after firing it. (Black powder residue is very corrosive)

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Today's useless piece of information

Liquid nitrogen sprayed under your armpit really hurts!

Vodka makes it better!

here endth the lesson.

Friday, October 14, 2005

While rabbits are in the news...

This is hilarious!

Peter Rabbit- Tank Killer
Beatrix Potter & Sven Hassel

I found the link on

He has some amazing links!

Sunday, October 09, 2005

On The Public, Police and Criminals

Found this excellent post on a group a few days ago. It has a US slant, but still runs true.

Part of the work- the rest is at the link below:

By LTC (RET) Dave Grossman, author of "On Killing."
Honor never grows old, and honor rejoices the heart of age. It does so because honor is, finally, about defending those noble and worthy things that deserve defending, even if it comes at a high cost. In our time, that may mean social disapproval, public scorn, hardship, persecution, or as always,even death itself. The question remains: What is worth defending? What is worth dying for? What is worth living for? - William J. Bennett - in a lecture to the United States Naval Academy November 24, 1997
One Vietnam veteran, an old retired colonel, once said this to me:
"Most of the people in our society are sheep. They are kind, gentle, productive creatures who can only hurt one another by accident." This is true. Remember, the murder rate is six per 100,000 per year, and the aggravated assault rate is four per 1,000 per year. What this means is that the vast majority of Americans are not inclined to hurt one another. Some estimates say that two million Americans are victims of violent crimes every year, a tragic, staggering number, perhaps an all-time record rate of violent crime. But there are almost 300 million Americans, which means that the odds of being a victim of violent crime is considerably less than one in a hundred on any given year. Furthermore, since many violent crimes are committed by repeat offenders, the actual number of violent citizens is considerably less than two million.
Thus there is a paradox, and we must grasp both ends of the situation: We may well be in the most violent times in history, but violence is still remarkably rare. This is because most citizens are kind, decent people who are not capable of hurting each other, except by accident or under extreme provocation. They are sheep.
I mean nothing negative by calling them sheep. To me it is like the pretty, blue robin's egg. Inside it is soft and gooey but someday it will grow into something wonderful. But the egg cannot survive without its hard blue shell. Police officers, soldiers, and other warriors are like that shell, and someday the civilization they protect will grow into something wonderful.? For now, though, they need warriors to protect them from the predators.
"Then there are the wolves," the old war veteran said, "and the wolves feed on the sheep without mercy." Do you believe there are wolves out there who will feed on the flock without mercy? You better believe it. There are evil men in this world and they are capable of evil deeds. The moment you forget that or pretend it is not so, you become a sheep. There is no safety in denial.
"Then there are sheepdogs," he went on, "and I'm a sheepdog. I live to protect the flock and confront the wolf."
If you have no capacity for violence then you are a healthy productive citizen, a sheep. If you have a capacity for violence and no empathy for your fellow citizens, then you have defined an aggressive sociopath, a wolf. But what if you have a capacity for violence, and a deep love for your fellow citizens? What do you have then? A sheepdog, a warrior, someone who is walking the hero's path. Someone who can walk into the heart of darkness, into the universal human phobia, and walk out unscathed

Friday, October 07, 2005

Reality TV- 'Degradation Island'

Visit this site for today's episode of "Degradation Island" where 'eye candy' debase themselves for fame, cash and prizes!

Episode one
All clothing was removed overnight and replaced with sackcloth. A 'fountain' has appeared in the kitchen area. This life-size replica of Benito Mussolini will dispense a reasonable chardonnay when it's genitalia are manipulated correctly.

100 cubic metres of well-matured rubbish from the local tip has arrived in the yard and must be hand-sorted and bagged for recycling, before the showers will be turned on. Hidden in this pile are cans of food, with the labels removed.

The toilet paper has disappeared and has been replaced with newspaper...
tomorrow we bring you "groveling for Dollars"!

Episode two
Today our contestants have the opportunity to make money by groveling in mud!
The game: Plastic bones must be taken from a dog's bowl on one one side of the mud wallow, to a dog's kennel on the other side of the wallow. Each bone retrieved gains $200 bucks to the contestants account!
Now the conditions: 1-Bone must be carried in the mouth. 2- the torso must remain in contact with the mud. 3- the legs are tied at the ankles. Game lasts four hours- will their greed go the distance?

Otherwise, to enhance voyeuristic interest in sordid public displays of affection, oil of ylang-ylang has been added to the air conditioning- ginseng and royal jelly supplements have been provided, along with video's of "The Story of O". Ravel's "Bolero" is played subliminally...

Alternative protein sources save money.

Episode Three

Eating Invertebrates for cash!

The stakes are high- $1 per gram!
A choice smorgasboard of honeyed locusts, chocolate cicada, stir-fried worms, Huhu grubs au natural, candied starfish, braised limpits, sea cucumbers and all the other delights our chef Mr Arigato Banzi Deathstar can concoct...

In keeping with this theme, our 'Boss of the week" will dine on Lobster, Bluff Oysters and Whitebait, washed down with a Cloudy Bay Sav. Blanc.
Those wishing to to forgo this delightful repast may grovel before the webcams. Highest polling victim, errr, contestant gets a Happy Meal.

Several contestants have been talking about those IN BREACH OF THE RULES .

Here on degradation Island, when ONE screws up, we punish EVERYONE!
Overalls with a target between the shoulderblades have been issued. Also, everyone gets a paintball gun with 50 rounds! I guess you can figure out that the one who gets the most points(scored on the target) gets Das Boot!

You are exempt being shot at when you are naked...

(Note:- I forfeit any claim to the above, as my intellectual property, in exchange for a really big plasma screen TV, a new wireless Sony DVD home theater system and a bottle of Jack Daniels)

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Why don't kids swim?

Once upon a time, when parents knew what was best for their children, there was a push to get pools in schools, so kids could learn how to swim. They had swimming lessons at school and access tot he pool over summer for a very modest cost.

This worked fine for several generations.

Then along came the compliance-obscessed snivel servants, who decided that pools were cess-pools of bacteria and had to be constantly tested and monitored.

Never mind that the health problems caused by pool water were less than drinking the stuff from the tap!

Now kids are sheltered from bertie germ- the school pools are all closing, due to compliance costs, but that's OK- our kids won't get sick from pool water.

They just drown instead...

And the grey-shoe wearers attention turns to sweet, fatty and salty food in schools...

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

More Retail Hell

A while back, I wrote on the subject of fugly people and discount stores- red ones and otherwise. Nothing has changed, except they descend to a lower plane of hell, come that affliction, SCHOOL HOLIDAY TIME.

My main object in shopping is to get out, in the least amount of time, with everything I need (except my Wa)

As usual, two of the isles were totally blocked by pods of she-mountains, the next isle had a pallet of soft drink parked right in the middle and in the others, a gaggle of the permanently baffled tried to decipher those lists of contents found on the sides of cans. Why they bother is a mystery, as the stuff is all inedible for human consumption. Ah- yes, now I see why it appeals to them!

Grabbing my packet of firelighters (try cutting kindling with one working hand) I made a dash for the checkout, trying to shut out the sound of the dead-eyed bovines lowing to their missing offspring- the ones orbiting the chupa-chups stand.

To find one organic robot passing stuff over the scanner in slow-motion and a queue of old farts out shopping for recreation. All wearing wet wool.

It was horrible!

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Old technology- fun as a hobby, not to live with!

Finally, after several months of playing around, I got my muzzle-loading rifle to fire every time, first time and put a ball about where I want it to go!

You gain a whole new respect for those who had to use these to put food on the table and fend off hostiles. They kept them going without a toolbox full of modern lubricants and rust inhibitors (like I have!)

They probably didn't have the luxury to spend days at the range, learning how to use one, either- or the money to waste on powder, shot and caps.

Now it's time to get out and see what a .50" lead ball does to these damn rabbits that are digging the paddocks up!

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Target- Sanctimonius assholes at 'work'

Just watched another session of nit-picking and hair-splitting. I bet those wankers are all members of the Labour party!

When they can't find real juicy stuff, like knicker-sniffers or arse scratchers, they start on the safety angle. Which might be good if real safety standards were being compromised.

The latest was the terrible crime of appliance servicemen not doing insulation testing after replacing a switch. The nearest analogy I can think of is requiring your car to have a new WOF after being fitted for a new tyre.

Technically they are correct- this test is required by the regulations, but in the real world is seldom done. Hell, I have serviced thousands of appliances without doing so. If I thought it needed an insulation test, I would have done so. Changing a simple part doesn't, regardless of what some arse- covering regulation might state.

What is the this self appointed watchdog achieving?

1- As often as not, two tradesmen turn up as an arse-covering excercise. (guess who pays)

2- Unnessesary work is done (guess who pays)

3- Companies operate from a holding company and simply change name and wind the old one up- It's cheaper and easier to do that that to clear your name.

Most of these people are well aware the customer wants the job done as cheap as possible. While the costs of servicing seem high, the friggin' compliance costs -all the permits, cerification, training, test equipment are huge- without getting into vehicle costs and tax issues!

I personally know of several trademen targeted. One simply ignored their demand for an explanation, the other sent a rather witty response to his investigating, but not eating from, a box of chocolates!

I wish more of these companies spyed on would tell them to fuck off!

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Back to the Moon

Some real investment into the future!

This time it's not to place a flag, but to establish a foothold. The first step in our breaking out into the galaxy.

An essential step, if we are to be around in the long haul.

Until we spread out, we are vulnerable as a species, to any stay rock that happens along. If you want to learn more about this, get the outstanding BBC DVD 'Space'

The cost of taking these next steps is less than rebuilding Iraq- and money far better spent!

The cost of not moving into space is our survival as a species.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

My pick for tonights election winners

Them that keep their snouts in the trough-win.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

I will post when I can

I'm in writing mode again, so won't be posting a lot here.

I prefer to write stuff that I CAN SELL!

"Your love gives me such a thrill- but love can't pay the bills- I WANT MONEY!- that's what I want, I WANT MONEY"

'Meddlers In Time- Book One' is available on CD for $15- only in NZ- contact me at wwfeatherston

When I convince some asshole to print it, I will be the first to spread the word!

Meanwhile, I have to crack on with Book II.

BTW, I spit on govamint (taxpayer) funding- my work stands or fall on it's own merits!

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Part of the problem in New Orleans

An Unnatural Disaster: A Hurricane Exposes the Man-Made Disaster of the Welfare State by Robert Tracinski Sep 02, 2005

by Robert Tracinski

Robert Tracinski is the editor of and The Intellectual Activist.
It took four long days for state and federal officials to figure out how to deal with the disaster in New Orleans. I can't blame them, because it also took me four long days to figure out what was going on there. The reason is that the events there make no sense if you think that we are confronting a natural disaster.
If this is just a natural disaster, the response for public officials is obvious: you bring in food, water, and doctors; you send transportation to evacuate refugees to temporary shelters; you send engineers to stop the flooding and rebuild the city's infrastructure. For journalists, natural disasters also have a familiar pattern: the heroism of ordinary people pulling together to survive; the hard work and dedication of doctors, nurses, and rescue workers; the steps being taken to clean up and rebuild.
Public officials did not expect that the first thing they would have to do is to send thousands of armed troops in armored vehicle, as if they are suppressing an enemy insurgency. And journalists—myself included—did not expect that the story would not be about rain, wind, and flooding, but about rape, murder, and looting.
But this is not a natural disaster. It is a man-made disaster.


Monday, September 12, 2005

The gods just smiled on me.... I think.

Sitting at home with hayfever, burning eyes and a sinus headache, having spent all day trying to be civil and not slay my family.

Then the phone rings just as I'm about to eat dinner and it's a telemarketer.

That must be the human sacrifice I ordered....

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Feckin' hayfever!

Every year, for a couple of days, some filthy plant spreads it's vile pollen and I get sodding hayfever. Lasts for about three days, in which time I produce what feels like about 20 litres of snot.

Today is that frickin' day!

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Morons I have meet- schoolteachers

It takes a strange bird to take up this job. Not so much those that teach at a primary level, but at secondary school and above, the geeks, freaks and fascists come out to play!

We had more than our share, during my school days. I don't know if they were psychologically damaged prior, or the problem was more of a situational psychosis, but some of these characters should have been in an institution- we still had them in New Zealand in those days.

Like any pack of predators, we could smell fear and baited them with no mercy! Unlike today, straight out abuse was crossing the line, so we had to be more subtle. Hiding any writing materials was always good for a wind-up, as was gluing locks and sabotaging lab equipment.

Anyone who wore socks with sandals had to be fair game, as was a person who wore their trousers up to their ribcage!

Then there was 'Bacco Bill', an ape-descended lifeform very loosely called a science teacher. Rumour had it that he was a wartime friend of the principal, thus he had a job for life. I can't recall ever learning a single thing in his classes, off the syllabus, anyway!

He was about as stable as a pissed priest sitting on a keg of gunpowder, with a lighted candle up his arse.

His class had two types of student. Those as dumb as mud and considered write-offs and a few bright enough to pass the subject, regardless, thus not making him look so bad.

The inevitable would happen, as it does in these circumstances- the bright kids make the bullets and give them to the dullards to fire. Nothing like someone being dragged off for a good thrashing to brighten up a dull period!

The highlight of the year was a lesson involving the Van De Graaff generator, an ingenious gadget that generated loads of static electricity. Normally this would be the display and lecture on a defunct machine, dragged from the storeroom and dusted of for it's annual showing. Not this year- a couple of the brighter and more devious types repaired it, so it was fire it up or lose face!

For a mental picture, just imagine Homer Simpson entangled in an electric fence of 3/4 for an hour! Every time he went near this thing-POW!

At least 4 beatings were given out for uncontrollable laughter.

It was a lesson alright. Wisdom does not always come with age!

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Looters, snakes, disease and now... Lawyers

Reading some of Interdictor's blog and came across the inevitable:

And I thought we had a culture of blame here!

Monday, September 05, 2005

Civil Defence in New Zealand

There is one lesson that we can all learn from The New Orleans disaster.

Don't rely on the government (or anyone else) to bail you out!

You MUST be responsible for yourself and your own.

I have been involved with the front lines of civil defense for many years- SAR, Red Cross, St. John's, Ambulance, Army. There are a lot of good people out there, not a lot of resources though. Certainly not enough to go around in a really catastrophic event.

While some of the floods of the last few years may have been a disaster to those involved, they were a pin-prick by comparison with a cat.4 hurricane hitting a city bigger than Auckland.

The sort of event that is more likely here is, as we know, a large (8+ Richter scale) earthquake. Imagine that hitting Wellington, then combining that with a raging southerly gale.

Some of the exercises indicate that unlike the optimistically stated 3 days that people may have to manage on their own resources, it may be more like 2-3 weeks! Certainly in cut-off smaller outlying communities.

I live in such a place. A large scale earthquake would almost certainly cut off our access links (a rail tunnel, mountain pass road access and several bridges over major rivers) We live in a small community of 2,500 people. Being rural, food won't be too much of a problem and there are good water supplies close to town. Most houses have woodfires and as we get many power cuts, a lot of us have supplies of candles, gas lanterns, even generators.

We would be a lot better off than those in the metro centres. Trouble is, a lot of our population commute to these metro areas to work. I used to keep a small pack full of basics- enough to keep me going while I walked the 80km home. I wonder how may take their preparations that far!

At home, we carry far more than the recommended supplies. Being into camping, we have the whole range of tents, cookers, ropes, water containers, lanterns, solar showers and so on. The chainsaw would probably be very useful and I have a small solar power system that can run a radio and some lighting.

The numerous firearms will keep the pot filled.

And in our possession!

Having said don't rely on others, it is very useful to team up with others you know and trust. Talk with them, plan and bounce ideas off each other. Think about how to improvise things, what you need to have stored, what skills you all have and what you might need to do to keep your family safe.

I live in a small community, with many outstanding individuals in it. It also has it's share of criminal and deadbeat lowlifes who repeatedly proven they have a total disregard for others. Let them prey on those who think they are above needing to protect themselves.

You can always shoot them later!

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Fathers Day

Ah- that would be the one where, instead of going out and actually enjoying myself, I get to do stuff with the family!

Fun stuff, like taking crap to the dump, cutting firewood, gardening, preparing meals, looking after kids...

Who's day was it again?

Saturday, September 03, 2005

New Orleans Live

Here is the story, warts and all.

Think major earthquake and city here...

This stuff is amazing. I wish I could be there with the guys putting this blog out!

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Electioneering shit-fights

XNC2 is alway political, but never more than just before an election (It has been in existance for two of these)

There are several factions:

The piss-takers- everyone is far game.

The vocal lefties (about 3 or 4 but fuck do they make a racket!)

The others, who tend to be more centralist

The Helen-worshipers are quite amusing in their blind adherance to the 'Red Flag'

Interestingly, at least two of them are, by their own admission well-off, one admitting to an income of 6 figure and the other hinting at that (wealthy family,etc)

They are a pair of fuckin' space cadets, one in IT and the other a fuckin' 'artist', who has produced a couple of (probably) state funded 'books', that would have the same reading audience of a catholic abortion guide!

One can take the shit and give it back, the other repeatedly threatens to run to the cops over 'libel' issues. Like they give shit!

We have about 6 Libertarianz in this group, who sound moderate by comparison!

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

I Hate Radio!

If I wanted annoying prattle in my ear all day long, I would buy a Cockatoo!

The next time I buy any kind of sound equipment, it will be without a radio tuner. People in my house have this annoying habit of turning it on, then leaving the bloody room!

I can't stand it! Some moronic twenty-something wanking on about nothing in the morning, whinging pensioners on the talkback and a news service designed by Americans with ADD, who think no nwes is worth of more than a short sentence. Unless it is sport, in which case they wank on about that for the next ten minutes.

The music is always something I don't actually want to listen too, at that time, or more usually, at any time.

As for Crazy Frog, lets not even go there!

Why people have a need to listen to 'Breakfast Shows' is beyond me. All I want before 10am is coffee and a big helping of Shut The Fuck Up from anyone near me.

I don't do mornings...

Monday, August 29, 2005

Oxygen Theives

Here is one, along with stealing everything else, I reckon his biggest crime is stealing oxygen!

337 convictions for theft, fraud, arson and impersonating a police officer. The prick is impersonating a human being!

That many convictions must say this arsehole cannot/will not learn. He needs a long drop on a short rope, or at the very least locking up permanantly(at hard labour) personally, I favour the first option.

This peice of shit is simply a waster of qxygen and has shown no sign of ever wanting to change. When I wrote the piece 'Rif-Raf to the Reservation' (below), this was exactly the type of candidate for the facility described.

The Central Plateau Recidivist Facility.
This is an area of several kilometers square, secured by three layers of high security fencing and is constantly patrolled by the armed forces. There is a 300 metre exclusion zone around this perimeter, which is a free-fire zone, where patrols will fire on anyone, without warning. Inside the wire, there are no staff. Inner fencing is electrified and seismic detectors listen for the sound of digging. Watchtowers with high tech equipment watch both sides of the wire and relay information to the vehicle and foot patrols. They are equipped with automatic weapons and are designed to fend off a massed break-out or break-in.

There is an entry point, which consists of a large high-security bunker. This is where inmates are received and all incoming supplies are rigorously searched. Visitors are never permitted to the facility.The prison has a few utility buildings, which are of concrete and steel construction.

Supplies are minimal and basic. Food must be grown, otherwise inmates must exist on 'K' ration type food. Wood must be cut for heating and cooking. There is no medical treatment, but lethal drugs are available for those who wish to commit suicide.

This is the end of the line.

Thieve from the types in there and see how long you last!

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Televison Watching- Why?

If I didn't have a good DVD collection, I would never watch TV. If I didn't have a family who watch the damned thing, it would be off in a room on it's own.

The damn thing blerts out ceaseless advertisments that insult the intelligence of my goldfish.

That sanctimonious whinging AKA Target has just finished in the background. Those assholes whine louder than a bus full of old pommie tourists! I wish more companies would just tell them to fuck off and die!

Don't even get me started on the continual parade of 25 year-olds impersonating schoolkids and the 'smart woman, dumb-as-mud man' shows. Whoever comes up with this dribble should be drowned in a bucket of their own excrement. or preferably, mine!

Bubble gum for the eyes!

Saturday, August 27, 2005


One of the indicators that standards are slipping in society is the acceptance of lateness.

I have been dropping my son off at school for a while now and often stay around until the bell goes at 9am. He is special needs and I like to keep up with what's going on at school, but that's another story.

As I am leaving, there is a regular procession of late arrivals- the same ones all the time. Would it be so hard to get your arse out of bed five minutes earlier? It's not just getting kids to school on time, this is epidemic. People can't/won't bother to get to appointments, meetings, social events on time. My wife's family is that unorganised, that I always give them a time of thirty minutes before the event is actually due to start.

When I have taken these people to task for their tardiness, I usually get something along the lines of "what's the big deal?" They seem genuinely puzzled that someone sees something wrong with their idleness.

Time is a non-renewable resource. DON'T FRICKIN' WASTE MINE!

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Blog Software

Found something interesting about this software. I started work on a post in draft form. When I finally published it, 5 days later, it appeared behind all the articles I had posted since!

Such is life, can't complain when someone else provides a service at no cost to myself!

Bets Anyone?

How long does it take a bent ex-mp to make Home Detention?

She WILL get leave to apply, normally it takes some months. I reckon this one will be out with a Gucchi ankle bracelet, within 6 weeks of sentencing.

Let's have a sweepstake- winner gets my latest book, in CD format! Hope you like Lad's Adventure Yarns!

Monday, August 22, 2005

The death penalty for...


I have been out of circulation for two days sorting out problems caused by hijackers. Normally I only visit a variety of known safe site, but I was in search of drivers for a new DVD-ROM, and got badly infected. Unfortunately my spyware remover software had expired. It was like going back to dial-up in the early nineties, again.

These spyware users are nothing but thieves , vandals and trespassers! Thieves of time, information and bandwidth, invading private property, namely my hard drive.

Time is a non-renewable resource. We only get a set amount. Those who waste it are stealing my life and I want theirs in return!
When I say they should receive the death penalty, I'm not talking about the soft options of the electric chair, lethal injection or even hanging. I'm talking seriously medieval!- hot irons, the Pear, the rack and being broken on the wheel.

At least I can yell abuse at deliverers of junk mail and telemarketers, when I feel the need. Who knows where these rapers of small furry animals lurk?

If I ever meet someone who admits to writing this stuff, they will be in for the thrashing of their worthless life!

Saturday, August 20, 2005

He's dead, get over it!

I'm sick of hearing about David Friggin' Lange!

Lets look at one aspect of his 'saintly'life:

He was a lawyer who got plenty of South Auckland scrotes off their charges (or a reduced sentence)

How the fuck is that doing the law-abiding a favour? Keeping the crims at large- what an outstanding contribution to NZ!

Well I won't friggin' miss him!

Friday, August 19, 2005

Stress relief in progress

After the shopping trip from hell (tommorrows topic), satan's little helpers have been banished to the far end of the house, while I have withdrawn to consume vodka and watch 'The Meaning of Life'

How much does a vasectomy cost, these days?

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Rif-raf to the reservation

It has often been discussed- what to to with the lowlife recidivists of our land. They refuse to live within our laws or boundaries of decent behavior. You know the type, ever town or city has one. They live in a 'house' that is surrounded by dead cars, mounds of junk, feral children and 'For Sale' signs.

Nightly entertainment includes drug-dealing, all-night parties, domestic violence, boom-boom music and wild dogs barking.

These are the ones that clog our courts, social services and prisons. They are behind most of the 'Petty crime'- burglary's, car theft, dishonesty offenses graduating to the more serious assaults, rapes and murders. Ask any cop who has been on the job for a while and they will tell you how a few families are responsible for most of the crime in any given town, or suburb in the bigger center's.

My proposal:

You refuse to work, habitually abuse substances and have a history of criminal offending. You have been confirmed as a recidivist.
On the third conviction for an offense carrying a penalty of more than 5 years imprisonment, you are committed to Life Imprisonment at:

The Central Plateau Recidivist Facility.

This is an area of several kilometers square, secured by three layers of high security fencing and is constantly patrolled by the armed forces. There is a 300 metre exclusion zone around this perimeter, which is a free-fire zone, where patrols will fire on anyone, without warning. Inside the wire, there are no staff. Inner fencing is electrified and seismic detectors listen for the sound of digging. Watchtowers with high tech equipment watch both sides of the wire and relay information to the vehicle and foot patrols. They are equipped with automatic weapons and are designed to fend off a massed break-out or break-in.

There is an entry point, which consists of a large high-security bunker. This is where inmates are received and all incoming supplies are rigorously searched. Visitors are never permitted to the facility.

The prison has a few utility buildings, which are of concrete and steel construction. Supplies are minimal and basic. Food must be grown, otherwise inmates must exist on 'K' ration type food. Wood must be cut for heating and cooking. There is no medical treatment, but lethal drugs are available for those who wish to commit suicide.

This is the end of the line.

Another WOFTAM

Values to be included in school curriculum:,2106,3381046a10,00.html

Well bugger me with a fishfork! Shouldn't this sort of thing be happening as a matter of course. Honesty, respect, responsibility? These are basic behaviors for a civilized society.

OK, they could be seen a bit more, but at the end of the day, most people follow them most of the time. Probably 1-2% of society decide to live totally outside of these norms. It is well known in law enforcement circles, that if you rounded up 4-5 lowlife family's in most medium sized towns and shot them, crime would drop to bugger-all.

If they think they can address the problems of today's ferals by bringing in a unit standard for humanity 101, they have their heads lodged firmly up orifice posterior. This sort of behavior can only be learned in the home. At best the schools can reinforce the positive values most kids are aware of, but need reminding of- as do most adults! I see there has been some kind of social experiment at Cannibal, er, Cannons Creek school, in Porrirua. They gather points for good behavior, which leads to prizes being given.

Excuse me? They are rewarded for doing what they ought to? Do you get prizes in life for not fucking up?- the DBP aside, no- you have to do better than the norm. (In my world, anyway!)

I wonder if they have looked to the Catholic schools for this idea? Say what you will about the Mickies, they run a far better school, these days (now that they have got the Nazi Nuns out!)
If so, they have overlooked on factor. A selection process. Parents have to make an effort AND PAY MONEY (not much), to get their kids into these schools. This tends to eliminates the feral lowlife's noxious offspring from these schools.

This reminds to to write up my thoughts on dealing with the recidivist part of society- another day...

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

'Justice' system- Yeah, Right!

Another from the 'Tui Ad' files:

Michael Vaimauga took on three offenders at night, to protect a neighbour’s property from burglary, and to deliver one of them to justice. That is the kind of responsibility every healthy community wants. But not our Judicary, whom I spit on.

Can't these overpaid dumbfuck hand-wringers even comprehend the laws they are meant to operate by?

36. Arrest of person believed to be committing crime by night—
Every one is
protected from criminal responsibility for arresting without warrant any person whom he finds by night in circumstances affording reasonable and probable grounds for believing that that person is committing an offence against this Act.

39. Force used in executing process or in arrest— Where any
person is justified, or protected from criminal responsibility, in …making or assisting to make any arrest, that justification or protection shall extend and apply to the use by him of such force as may be necessary to overcome any force used in resisting such execution or arrest, unless the arrest … [ can be] made by reasonable means in a less violent manner…”

So where does this say "Thou shalt not take the law into your own hands". In a sane society it is the right, no- the DUTY of a citizen to take action against a lawbreaker. Not to wait for the police to maybe turn up, but to take action.

Where the fuck do they find these cretins? I happened to be looking through the ACT site

And found this doozy:

Wacky Greens
An obscure Green MP, Mike Ward may in five weeks be Minister of Transport. Ward, is proud he has never driven a car, and for that matter has often not had a job. He told the Local Authority Traffic Institute last week he had discovered the answer to traffic, on his trips from Wellington Airport to parliament. “Remove all traffic lights so motorists have to negotiate each intersection and the answer to the road toll is to plant trees in the middle of the road.” At this point his audience’s incredulity became uncontrolled laughter. “The trees should be in huge pots and moved around so motorists would not know from one day to the next where the trees will be.”

So now I know where they find Judges!

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Carless days- what a load of arse!

I wouldn't be too concerned about this or petrol rationing. I have noticed a trend whereby outrageous statist control measures have been put out, then denied shortly after.

They are testing the water. If there is a public outcry, it is claimed that 'this was just a discussion paper" If it goes unnoticed- watch out.

I remember the first carless day fiasco- it was exactly that. People ignored it, got an exemption or got a old wreck as a second car. Back then, it wasn't too well enforced, but given today's penchant for using the police as the uniformed branch of the IRD, well, you can imagine what those extra 250 police would be used for...

The one I would be more concerned about happening is the 90kph speed limit. With alleged petrol shortages and the catchphrase of 'In the interests of Public Safety...' thrown in, I wouldn't be surprised to see this one slipped in. Not this side of the election, but soon after, should Labour's Thought Police return to power. I wonder what the charge is to be- excessive speed or wasting petrol?

After all, ministerial limo's have some underling to take the fall.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Yeah, right!

From The Tui ad file:,2106,3378419a10,00.html

She said then that she had not known she was pregnant until she woke up to find her baby dead in bed beside her. Without waking her partner, she had cut the umbilical cord and dumped the baby over a 1.6m high fence at the back of her property.

Now who actually believes this story?

I Don't!

Nobody could have such a lack of self-awareness, without being totally drug-addled. I've seen a couple of births and they aren't exactly something you could sleep through! The same goes for a pregnancy. I'm reliably informed that you know something is up, from very early on.

Or is this just another case of 'Mad Cows' disease....

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Morons I have known- a weekly rant (3)

The Army Instructor (Gruntus Moronicus)

There is an old adage that those who can- do and that those who can't teach.
Never did I find this more true than in the Army Instructor. Fortunately, the idiots were balanced out by some truly first class people. This tale is not about them!

The Army has an interesting approach to instructing. The first step is to inadequately prepare you for a task, then to roundly abuse and humiliate you for failing to excel at said task. This is presumably character building and has nothing to do with their poor staff retention rates. Hold onto this thought and I will come back to it later.

The Instructor is a person who is, often as not, one lesson ahead of the student, but that's OK- he is always right. Question him about it and you will soon learn not to. To repeatedly question him puts you in the same IQ bracket. I don't know about now, but back in the 1970's cruel and unusual punishment was very much in vogue.

The instructors that I talk about here are easily recognized. The are usually short (surprise, surprise) and stocky. The forehead tends to slope down to the unibrow and the little piggy eyes. They have a strange manner of speech- in addition to the usual service jargon, they LOVE to use big words (anything more than two syllables) Trouble is, they almost always use them out of context and/or mispronounce them! Much like a parrot they have no need to understand what they speak, just repeat stuff- loudly and repeatedly. Shouting was always a good substitute for communication skills, apparently.

It's hard to single any particular one out there- their hallmark is they have no real individual personality whatsoever. At least there are in a niche where they have a use. Recruits may more may not out-evolve them and come to recognize that these clowns were as dumb as mud- they just had a little more knowledge, with emphasis on the little.

By a selection process based on time served and also used by algae, they often rise to senior positions, by virtue of anyone with more talent having left to find a more gainful occupation. With the top jobs held by so many brain-dead drones, the smarter were more likely to seek opportunities elsewhere, thus continuing the cycle.

Those of us with bad attitudes had a name for them- Victim Of The System. They were condemned to live within it forever, being unable to adapt to life elsewhere. And they believed the bullshit they used to spout. Impossible to fell sorry for them, they where such obnoxious crap-heads....

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Feck off!

Arse biscuit!

I like cake!

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Credit where it's due

Called the police to a nasty domestic, a couple of nights ago. The women at the call centre was really good and had a car around there promptly.

When I say bad one, I heard someone being hit and there was much breaking of dinnerware, ranting and gnashing of teeth! Heard all this while out in the garage, some distance from their house, which is across the road. I thought about letting them beat themselves stupid, but decided to call the cavalry, as they have small children there. They shouldn't see that sort of crap.

Anyway, after this was all over, the police gave me a call and thanked me for calling them!

Didn't expect that!

Pass the Maxolon!

Just about time to watch the 'Leaders' debate.

I have a bet with myself that they will all be at each other and nothing of any consequence will be said.

A cage fight would be sooo much more fun- and think of the ratings!

I suppose there is there is an extremely small chance that something amusing will happen, such as someone having a massive stroke, or their brain imploding.

I can dream...

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Introducing XNC2, an MSN group

XNC2 is one of NZ's most active MSN groups. It has been around for almost as long as MSN groups have been around.

Originally designed as a backup to the XNC News Community, an xtra-managed group, in case that group ever melted down.

As it did, earlier in the year-MSN pulled the plug for unknown reasons- possibly copyright or bandwidth theft. The xtra staff responsible did not address the warning in time, and down the gurgler it went.

No matter- all the 'regulars' belonged to several 'satellite' groups and were soon back in contact, posting up to 3000 messages per week.

This group covers current and not so current events, plus the eternal battle between the left and those who want to run their own lives. There are on-going games, such as 'What's the Mystery item', a general chatter thread, recipe's, computer advice and on-line chat.

The usual mix of sages, loonies, ranters, comedians, shit-stirrers, know-it-alls and the plain weird!

It's worth a look!

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Who has to die?

Who has to die before this puke is actually put away for real?,2106,3371390a11,00.html

13 years old and a string of crimes as long as your arm, no doubt, as well as the three high-speed chases in 5 months. The odds on him being salvaged are next to none- the programming is now hardwired.

I have read enough inmate files, to see where this is going. I will repeat this yet again-HE WILL KILL SOMEONE.

The limp-wristed laws won't let him get locked away- some poor sod has to die first. Probably someone who is actually worth something. How the hell did we get to a society where 13yr old shitheads hold us to ransom? The pendulum has swung way too far from the 'hung for a loaf of bread' days (A myth, the death sentence was almost always commuted to transportation, thus creating Australia ;-)

I'm not at all objective on my outllok here- a similar puke near killed me two years ago and I will never regain the full use of my left hand. He was drunk and out racing. Being about 20, he got 21 months (of which he served about 10)

Lock him away, preferably for at least 5 years, at hard labour. If he does it again, stretch his worthless neck with a rope!

Other suggestions I have seen, involve a very large ball & chain permanantly attached and a collar, as seen on 'The Running Man'

Monday, August 08, 2005

Set for Stun!

More evidence that the bleeding hearts are never pleased. I thought they should be applauding the investigation of more non-lethal weapons for the police, but nooooo.

Mind you, the greens have always had the credibility of a fishnet condom...

For my part, I would prefer a good zapping, than having my ears widened by a 9mm slug- or a baton , for that matter.

If the green-between-the ears crowd had ever spent any time on a working farm, they would know that thousands of us get over a good belt from the electric fence, every day.

Sure wish we had Tasers, when I worked in the prisons!

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Morons I have known- a weekly rant (2)

I start this by stating that names and details of all morons have been altered, to hide their true identity and protect me from legal rumbustifications, should their social worker have internet access...

The Labourer (s)

During the mid-eighties, I found myself doing drainlaying and concrete work, due to a lack of more gentile positions. The company I worked for started to hire laborer's referred by WINZ (or whatever they were branded as, back then) To this day, I do not know why.

'They call me Wally', stated a cross between Mr Blobby and a compost heap. We took a look at him and thought 'Thought so!'

Wally bumbled through the week, pushing an idiot stick, if he was watched. The next Monday, he arrived complaining of his numerous rugby injuries. He disappeared just after smoko and returned waving a medical certificate. 'Hurt my back at work', he announced, which spelt the end of Walter.

'Sooty' was a shiftless, smelly alcoholic. Back in the sixties, he would have 'worked' for the railways, keeping a shovel or broom from getting lonely. 'Stop/go' man was beyond him, in a way that quantum physics was beyond him. He was one of the few people I have known that could not use a ruler. He did seem to cope with the sports page of the 'Press', as these types do.

His end came when he decided I had a easier job than his, while laying 18 inch diameter concrete pipe.
I used to sit on the previous pipe and guide the next one into the spigot, while it hung from a chain. These pipes weigh about 1/2 a ton each and use a big o-ring to get a watertight seal.
Anyway, after smoko, he jumped into the trench to grab that job. No problem for me, I will go on the crowbar and ram the pipe home. I did say to watch the fingers- immovable objects and irresistible forces, blah, blah,blah.

Then he discovered that holding this bloody great piece of concrete actually called for quite a bit of physical effort to hold in line, so he stuck his fingers in the pipe to get a better grip.

I called 'all clear?' and slammed the pipe home, with all my weight behing the crowbar. You guessed it-two fingers on each hand became one with the pipe and they were going nowhere. Had to pop the join with the loader, to get him out. Exit another.

I suppose once, they found gainful employment on the farm, shoveling shit from one place to another. Or in giving the livestock a smug feeling of superiority.

Saturday, August 06, 2005

Hiroshima, Nagasaki- Boom, Boom, we won!

60 years today since Hiroshima got the big firework!

I think it's time to give some of the owners of these 'little buckets of sunshine' some credit for their restraint in flinging them about, rather than whining about the fact that nukes exist....

Friday, August 05, 2005

My conspiracy theory of the week

This is my theory- I made it up myself, this is not copied from someone else!

The NZ police are under attack from organized crime.

Method of attack- implicate senor officers in historic rape cases

1- Lower police morale
2- Remove extremely experienced senior officers
3- Damage public credibility

All it takes is to find women who indulged in the drunken sexual antics common at parties, in the past. From there, blackmail would be the best inducement to 'spill the beans'

After all, this stuff was in the distant past - current partner probably knows nothing of these antics. To save face, she has to cry 'Rape' when the information is 'leaked' . The courts seem to be convicting on 'he said, she said' testimony with no physical evidence.

I would also like to get one thing straight here. I'm not condemning women for having the same sexual standards as men. Nothing wrong with being young drunk and horny!

But I bet there are a lot of blokes out there scared that the past could come back to haunt them. They have good reason to be afraid.