Thursday, January 18, 2007

Code Brown

I have just returned from a call out to deal with a 'Floater' in one of the public swimming pools.

For some reason the ditzoid lifeguard couldn't deal with a simple bit of excrement. (it's meant to be part of their job)

It isn't rocket science- scoop the turd and disinfect the water in the vicinity with a large dose of Hypochlorite.

Now why is it I'm not a fan of public swimming pools? thats right- I have to service the damned things.

Some people are filthy swine. Like the subhamans that climbed the fence & shit in one of the pools last Saturday night. If you get caught, you will be going for a swim in the sewerage pons, seeing as that seems to be your thrill!

At least I have the advantage of knowing which of the three local pools have the lowest levels of bodily fluids in them...
***

One thing that should be brown here isn't - the grass. This is a boom year for hay- I've never seen so much growth. Global warming seems to be good for some!

But my lawn should be browned off by now, not still growing.

4 comments:

MK said...

oh that is so disgusting, what kind of scumbag craps in a pool.

kg said...

The clue may be in the post title, MK. ;-)

Murray said...

kg I'm shocked! Shocked I tell you!!!

The degree to which I am shocked is so small as to require the use a special instrument to to measure it - rather like the Killer Queens integrity - yet shocked nonetheless.

Mrs Smith said...

kg is very naughty. I really shouldn't have laughed so much at that comment.