Thursday, January 18, 2007

Code Brown

I have just returned from a call out to deal with a 'Floater' in one of the public swimming pools.

For some reason the ditzoid lifeguard couldn't deal with a simple bit of excrement. (it's meant to be part of their job)

It isn't rocket science- scoop the turd and disinfect the water in the vicinity with a large dose of Hypochlorite.

Now why is it I'm not a fan of public swimming pools? thats right- I have to service the damned things.

Some people are filthy swine. Like the subhamans that climbed the fence & shit in one of the pools last Saturday night. If you get caught, you will be going for a swim in the sewerage pons, seeing as that seems to be your thrill!

At least I have the advantage of knowing which of the three local pools have the lowest levels of bodily fluids in them...

One thing that should be brown here isn't - the grass. This is a boom year for hay- I've never seen so much growth. Global warming seems to be good for some!

But my lawn should be browned off by now, not still growing.


MathewK said...

oh that is so disgusting, what kind of scumbag craps in a pool.

Anonymous said...

The clue may be in the post title, MK. ;-)

Unknown said...

kg I'm shocked! Shocked I tell you!!!

The degree to which I am shocked is so small as to require the use a special instrument to to measure it - rather like the Killer Queens integrity - yet shocked nonetheless.

Mrs Smith said...

kg is very naughty. I really shouldn't have laughed so much at that comment.