Sunday, June 11, 2006

Clean the friggin' sand out of yer ears!

A slight adaptation of an oldy (but still good!)

The 72 Virginians

After getting nailed by a 500 pounder, al-Zarqawi made his way to the pearly gates. There, he is greeted by George Washington. "How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" yells Mr. Washington, slapping him in the face.

Patrick Henry comes up from behind. "You wanted to end the Americans' liberty, so they gave you death!" Henry punches al-Zarqawi on the nose.

James Madison comes up next, and says "This is why I allowed the Federal government to provide for the common defense!" He drops a large weight on al-Zarqawi 's knee.

al-Zarqawi is subject to similar beatings from John Randolph of Roanoke, James Monroe, and 65 other people who have the same love for liberty and America.

As he writhes on the ground, Thomas Jefferson picks him up to hurl him back toward the gate where he is to be judged.

As al-Zarqawi awaits his journey to his final very hot destination, he screams "This is not what I was promised!"

An angel replies "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you, idiot. What did you think I said?"


Anonymous said...

Of course, the Koran just leaves potential martyrs to assume that the virgins are all female. Imagine getting there to find 72 Chris Carters........

Jude the Obscure said...

Have you read this

Murray said...

They're all Star Trek nerds.

A sci fi convention was the only place that 72 virgins could be found.