Monday, February 11, 2008

Inevitability


The time has come- the Walrus said
To talk of flaming rings
of hemorrhoids and fissures
of suppositories and and creams
and if my arse is boiling hot
and how the fucker stings!

13 comments:

Barnsley Bill said...

arseberries............
never sit down in wet grass and eat lots of bran.

Murray said...

Damn thats got to take it out of a man.

MathewK said...

Inevitability indeed, it'll get us all one day.. resistance is futile..

Anonymous said...

And the prize for "Too much information: goes too...

Anonymous said...

Under the 'you don't wanna know how I know' umbrella; the best treatment is Comvita Wound Care 18+ - Yep, good old manuka honey. No stinging, no burning, no feeling like someone putting needles....
Just soothing soothing soothing honey :-)
Hope that helps

Lindsay Mitchell said...

What are you moaning about? At least you didn't have to go through labour to get them:-)

the doctor said...

OB , you have my most sincere sympathy , I use Lignocaine cream to ease the discomfortand take away the pain .

Mrs Smith said...

Also apparently good for under the eyes, to give a youthful look. Wouldn't try it myself though.

Cactus Kate said...

Metamucil for relief....the orange flavour though.

It only hurts the first time they say :)

Anonymous said...

Oswald - that cream is also not subsidised. Costs a fortune AND gives you headaches.

mojo said...

Sincerest sympathy Os ... & Lindsay, you're probably not right.

Anonymous said...

The bush remedy is Dettol and a wire brush.

Harden up!

Oswald Bastable said...

It worked1

My arse no longer looks like a piece of steak that has been shot with a 30-06!