It was quite easy, really. I simply had to study the lifestyle of our most prolific breeders.
So forget IVF, vitamins and all that nonsense- here is my ten-point plan:
- Quit work- too much stress.
- Start smoking and drinking heavily- a few drugs won't hurt, either.
- Wear larger clothing- the Warehouse have tracksuits in marque sizes.
- The three food groups- Fish & Chips, McD's and KFC.
- Men-increase testosterone by reeneacting the 'Cook the eggs' scene from 'Once were Warriors'
- Women- improve your chances- make yourself available.
- Exercise- move the beer fridge into the garage.
- Vitamin P- your doctor will know what you mean.
- Eliminate rational thought.
- Learn not to care about anything- More Vitamin P will help!